Feeling Out of Synch With Your Partner?

couples May 06, 2015

Couples Therapy Groups produce transformations, both internally as well as within the couple relationship.

Being in a relationship can be incredibly healing. It can heal you in a complete turnabout from your family of origin issues. But it can also be challenging, stressful, and feel unharmonious at times when either member of the couple is struggling, or when there seems to be no camaraderie or “in-synch-ness” anymore. Sometimes we are in such different places from our partners.

Life is stressful, no question about it, whether you have kids, sleepless nights, aging parents, job insecurities, or whatever. The key is to remember that you will have conflict and hard times in relationships. That won’t stop. But it’s how you get out of those times that count. Can you resolve them quicker, can you use your tools, can you find a way back to connection faster? Staying on track with your partner is key, because it’s hard to have stress in your closest relationship while trying to deal with all the other many facets of life.

I often see couples with real struggles in their relationship who did not start working on the relationship soon enough, and the work feels like an uphill battle. A better approach is to get periodic “check ups” – don’t wait for things to get really broken, because then it’s much harder to recover.

Much like a personal trainer or coach in sports, therapy and workshops and couple therapy groups can be really helpful in keeping couples on track. One of my goals when working with people who want to have the best relationship with their partners is to show them that they can. It just takes learning ways to work on it, realizing that it takes consistent work, and finding a safe place to do the work. In couples therapy, in therapy groups workshops, and even by reading couple therapy books, (click here to read more), we learn tools that can help us develop better communication and connection with our partners, and re-ignite intimacy.

Being in a group is an amazing experience. You have a set amount of time to think about what you want to talk about, come together to do your work, and then experience what it’s like to be with other people and share about yourself and your relationship. It can be a very powerful experience. It can also help spotlight more issues and topics to work on in your relationship, if you feel like you’re in the doldrums. Couples are challenged to cut each other slack when needed, and learn skills that might help make the harder times more endurable and shorter to recover from.

The couples group that I’ll be facilitating for eight weeks in the summer is geared for people who have already done some couple therapy or joined other marriage counseling workshops or retreats. My hope is with this eight-week couples therapy group, people will get an opportunity to see that other couples have strengths and challenges, and that they will be able to relate to the other group members, and learn and grow from them as well.

Do you feel like you’ve run out of ideas on how to solve the chronic patterns in your relationship that you don’t like or are uncomfortable with? Would you like to know how to stop feeling out of synch with your partner? Or maybe you just want more time to process your relationship and get more connected. To find out how a couples group can help, please read more about it on this page….


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