Demystifying Divorce Series: "Managing Conflict in Separation"



How do you know it’s time to engage a professional to get you through your divorce, work through the conflict, and make sure your children have healthy relationships with both parents? Perhaps you’ve already tried to work it out between you, and don’t want to invoke the courts — but you’re still dealing with issues around raising your children, while tension and conflict remain high.

Divorce and Mediation Experts, Chandler Hoffman and Susan Regan, discuss how engaging professionals in your process can help ensure the best possible outcome for your kids by strengthening communication and coming to mutual agreements.


They will get into the specifics around the following topics:

  • Services Available to You: Mediation, Co-Parenting Counseling, and Parent-Child Coordinators Explained
  • When and Why Should You Engage Professionals
  • Signs you Might Benefit from Working with a Professional
  • What Happens in the Courts: Why courts employ mediators and Parent-Child Coordinators, and how you can benefit from securing these resources.
  • Addressing Parent Alienation: How can you best support your children, when there’s a lost connection with one of the parents?
  • Managing Conflict: Why is it that we cannot always move past the conflict, after a separation? What can we do about it?
    Watch the entire video below, or select the individual items, which are of interest to you:

When & Why to Engage Professionals
Services Available to You
When to Use a Parent-Child Coordinator
Addressing Parent Alienation
How to Work with Us


Dr. Chandler Hoffman is the Founder of Amity Consulting, an organization, which assists individuals and families considering or going through divorce and family reorganization. Amity Consulting was conceived with the intention to improve the circumstances of families going through divorce by offering consultation, psychotherapy, and mediation.

Susan Regan, MFT is a seasoned family therapist and certified mediator. She has the expertise to guide clients through difficult conversations, create a safe space to explore options, and help parents understand why their couple relationship has ended and help to find answers to the big questions that worry them, such as: what will they tell their kids, how will they manage their community and family, and will they ever and have closure?

We welcome your questions and feedback!

Please be sure to sign-up for our newsletters, as well, to receive additional resources around divorce and separation. Click on our website links below to sign-up!

Chandler Hoffman, Psy.D.
Amity Consulting
[email protected]

Susan Regan, MFT
Solutions Therapy and Mediation
Relationship Solutions
[email protected]


We do not give legal or financial advice. Our focus for these talks, is on the emotional well-being of people going through separation and divorce.



Chandler Hoffman, Psy.D.

Dr. Chandler Hoffman is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in working with families going through divorce and separation. Dr. Hoffman earned his doctorate in Psychology in 1998 at the California School of Professional Psychology and was licensed in California in 2000. He began his career working for the Superior Court of California, Alameda County for 15 years where he provided custody mediation and then supervised Family Court Services mediators in both the Juvenile and Family Court. Dr. Hoffman launched his private practice, which he calls Amity Consulting, with the goal to provide services to individuals, parents and children going through divorce and other Family Law processes. He specializes in non-adversarial and collaborative processes that help clients accommodate to and manage the changes necessary. He also provides Co-parenting counseling, Mediation, Child Custody Consultation, divorce coaching, adult and child therapy, Parent Coordination and couples counseling to help his clients manage and learn new ways to resolve conflicts.



Susan Regan is a family therapist and certified mediator who has been in private practice in San Francisco and Berkeley for over 25 years. Her interest in helping families separate and supporting children through the process started when she founded a nonprofit organization called Bay Area Children First. BACF’s mission was to provide counseling to families. Especially to help parents explore patterns from the family they were raised in, to heal themselves and the ways they were parented instead of passing these patterns onto their children. She has counseled hundreds of families, parents, couples, and children of families going through a separation or divorce.

In 2013, Susan founded an organization called Solutions: Therapy and Mediation. From her experience with BACF, she knew the only way to support children is to support the people raising them. Many of the families she works with are in the process of a separation or divorce. Susan’s goal is to help stabilize parents so they can ensure their children’s emotional and physical security while rebuilding a healthier family and heal themselves. Susan believes people can use divorce as a transformational process to recreate their lives and healthier relationships for themselves. Maybe the couple relationship didn’t work, but that doesn’t mean parents can’t be solid and continue having a happier life.

Susan Regan was raised in Boston. Some of her relationship models were conflictual and unhappy. Instead of fostering healthy connections in relationships, Susan observed many of the family and relationships in her community lack communication skills. Unhealthy patterns were passed on through generations. Susan saw and experienced the damage this dilemma had on families, especially children. Children deserve to be happy but if their parent’s relationship is dominated by high stress and conflict, it’s challenging for kids to feel cared for and seen. If separated parents can create a stronger parenting relationship and have less tension in their relationship, their children are more secure. Parents often need time to work on accepting that their couple relationship was not able to survive through all of life’s chapters, but that doesn’t mean failure. This just means the rebuilding of a different structure within the family and a new format of health and happiness.

Susan specializes in co-parenting therapy, mediation, facilitating divorce support groups, and emotionally supporting families going through a divorce.


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