Co-Parenting Isn’t One-Size-Fits-All: A New Approach to Evolving Family Relationships

By Susan Regan, MFT

For many parents, the end of a romantic relationship is just the beginning of a much longer—and often more complex—journey: co-parenting. While the early days after separation tend to be filled with high-stakes emotions and logistical upheaval, the truth is that co-parenting doesn’t begin and end with young children or a standard custody schedule. It evolves. And for it to evolve well, so must we.

At its best, co-parenting is a long-term relationship rooted in adaptability, personal responsibility, and an ever-deepening understanding of how to support our children—not just logistically, but emotionally. But most parents aren’t given the tools to navigate this kind of transformation. That’s where my work comes in.

This month, I’m thrilled to release a video series called Navigating Co-Parenting Together, which offers a deep, emotionally informed roadmap for parents at every stage of post-separation life. Whether you’re co-parenting toddlers, teens, or adult children, this series is designed to meet you where you are—and help you move forward with greater clarity, confidence, and compassion.

From Logistics to Lived Experience

Most co-parenting frameworks focus on the practical: who picks up when, what to do about holidays, how to communicate when emotions run high. These are critical foundations—but they’re not enough.

True success in co-parenting often hinges on the emotional work behind the scenes. It’s about recognizing when you’ve outgrown an arrangement, when your child’s needs are shifting, or when your own triggers are shaping your reactions more than you realize. That’s why I incorporate not only mediation and coaching, but also therapeutic tools to support the whole family system.

This approach doesn’t just solve problems—it builds emotional resilience. It helps parents understand themselves better, make space for growth, and avoid repeating the same painful patterns.

When the Rules Don’t Work Anymore

One of the most difficult challenges in co-parenting is when one parent seems disengaged—or worse, disregards agreed-upon parenting plans. Maybe they’re consistently late. Maybe they dismiss boundaries, disrupt routines, or refuse to communicate altogether. And often, the more responsible parent finds themselves carrying not only the emotional load, but the consequences.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. It’s a scenario I hear often, and one that can be incredibly disempowering—especially when legal remedies are slow, costly, or limited in scope.

That’s why the emotional strategies we explore in my work are so important. Rather than fixating on what the other parent isn’t doing, we shift focus to what you can do: strengthen your connection with your children, center your parenting around your own values, and reduce the emotional chaos that comes from reacting to someone else’s unpredictability.

In other words, we reclaim your locus of control.

An Interview Worth Watching

In fact, these exact dynamics were the focus of a recent conversation I had with Robert Terris, JD, MFT—an experienced family law attorney and therapist. In our interview, Co-Parenting: Outline for a New Approach to Counseling, we discussed the legal limitations many families face, the emotional toll of ongoing conflict, and the deep need for parents to focus inward, rather than outward, when things get hard.

Robert’s legal insights combined with his therapeutic background made for a powerful exchange, especially as we tackled the often-frustrating experience of co-parenting with someone who doesn’t show up consistently—or at all. It’s a must-watch for any parent feeling stuck between hope and reality.
👉 Coming May 21st!

The Emotional Journey Matters Just as Much as the Plan

Over the years, I’ve worked with parents who were just starting to separate, and others who’d been divorced for a decade but were still stuck in old patterns. What unites all of them is the emotional arc: grief, anger, bargaining, disappointment… and eventually, if they stick with the work, a powerful turning point toward acceptance and reconstruction.

That’s where real transformation happens.

And it’s also why my new video series doesn’t just stop at making a plan—it continues through the hardest parts: living the plan, adjusting when life changes, and healing old wounds that make co-parenting harder than it needs to be.

Let’s Redefine What Co-Parenting Can Look Like

Whether you’re in the early stages of a breakup or you’ve been separated for years, it’s never too late to rethink your approach to co-parenting. You don’t need perfection. You don’t need to “fix” the other parent. What you need is support, clarity, and a framework that helps you stay focused on what truly matters: your growth, your child’s well-being, and your ability to create peace even in imperfect circumstances.

This month’s Navigating Co-Parenting Together video series will walk you through it all. From high-conflict situations to new partner transitions, from early childhood to co-parenting adult children—this isn’t just a how-to guide. It’s a whole new lens.

Stay tuned and subscribe to receive each episode as it’s released. And if you’re ready to explore personalized support—whether through co-parenting therapy, individual coaching, or mediation—I’m here to walk that path with you.

Because while parenting after separation isn’t easy, it doesn’t have to be chaotic.

It can be conscious.
It can be kind.
And it can absolutely evolve with you.